"Now is the only time I know." -Fever Ray
I'm back at fighting with myself, I'm back at having everyone against me... At least in my own head this is how it comes off.
I let myself know and let myself become paranoid that everyone is upset with me, hates me, and is exhausted with me. I keep going against myself and I keep myself closed off from the world to keep from these thoughts from boiling.
I can't believe most of the shit that goes through my head, I can't believe I allow it. I'm never sure on how to start over again, cause once I try to it all comes back.
My time in Georgia is not perfect either and is making it so much worse. My father last week told him how I'm a big disappointment and questioning me.. Ever since I was little he did this, fucked with my head. I don't know why I ever looked up to him, spoke so highly of him. I drained myself this month and I'm ready to runaway from everything I know.
I'm ready to begin a clean slate but I'll just pull it all back to me instead of forgetting it.
