My head shakes and ponders. I look down constantly, not only from a lack of self confidence, but from fear and all sorts of feelings of uncertainty. I feel like I'm sitting at the head of a 80 ft table, alone. When the servant comes to bring me my plate its seems to be lacking interest to me. It seems he took a caff stripped it of its skin. Put a rotten peach in its mouth and just handed it to me as if I wanted the carcass to eat. I then have no choice. I have to take it. If I sent it back, god only knows what he would bring to me instead.
I seem to have nothing to care for anymore. The greatest part of feeling numb is that when another blow comes at you, you don't care. You just go with it. Its predictable so you just shrug and walk away. You're so tired of crying at this point.
When you know your life has no turning point, what do you do?
When you only buy material things cause its the only thing that makes you happy, what do you do?
When you sit at your desk at work and feel like the biggest failure and feel like your not even wanted in the world, what do you do?
When you've lost all your friends, what do you do?
When you can't get a hold of your family, what do you do?
When you begin to hate your family, what do you do?
If I had an answer I wouldn't be so pathetic.
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